After I caught her cheating, i didn’t show up to our anniversary

Pregnancy gave me these f/33

you can stay there but your clothes must go away

I asked Santa for Micah Parsons but he gave his jersey instead

[f] wish you were playing with my pussy instead 😋

Almost gave him a heart attack

You can stay but your clothes must go

This can must be broken: it gave me paws instead of wings

I rather have you inside of me instead of this toy

I'll happily take your dick instead

Getting tired of fucking myself, want to come fill me up instead?

Well I can’t offer you dinner in bed, but I can give you myself