When your ex-prison cellmate says "no hands slut," your wife

Your wife had to find a way to keep her co-workers happy

He was right and you knew it.

She had been fucking your mom in the ass every day for a week.

You were required to use her in the break room with everyone

You should've listened to your gf when she said you should jog

She was a predator.

You should be happy for me, babe. Don't be so selfish.

Your bully broke into your house while you were at work — he

I was so happy to see her when she got home.

Your wife knows you better than most

She... says she's studying...